I sit, atop a peninsula. Gazing out across the endless ocean, I am lulled in to a place of awakening. Alive. Cicadas calling, crickets chirping, pohutakawa sings along the blue horizon. Golden sunlight croons over my skin and I feel in my heart, You.
It is not the sight of the spiritual dimension that leads me to You. No, it is what this present world hints at that leads me to another. It is this unmistakable yearning. It is the constant hunger, the desire for something more that I know cannot be satisfied in this place. It is the deep ache that throbs within me, that comes alive when I see something beautiful, something full of grace, something that hints at these intertwined worlds and the relationship between the physical and the spiritual. It is the sadness that springs up from joy, the inability for mere physicality to satisfy a deeply spiritual wound. It is the incomplete beauty that the absence of You creates that awakens my thirst for You.
Papa, give me faith. Quiet my doubts and wrap me up in peace. This tornado of sand, sky, waves and stars is tiresome to my soul. It is in moments like these that the green of the sea speaks to the darkness in my heart, that new life begins to bloom and all I desire is You.
Shalom. This view of beauty pierces my soul so, that I cannot see such delight without experiencing sorrow. Such beauty shows me a paradise that has no place on this broken Earth, and taunts me with a glimpse of my Creator.